i can never understand what's going on around me. there are all these noises and pictures and i can't tell the difference between what i see and what you see and it's loud and chaotic and everything's happening all at once and i can't deal with it anymore and i don't know what's going on. i can't tell what things actually look like or sound like because the world is always changing and i just. don't. know.

but i always see you. and i always hear you. you are warm, and constant, and you show your feelings on your face so that i can see them. most of the bad things go away when you're near me, and i just want to hold your hand.

it doesn't have to be in a romantic way. i don't ever want to make you angry or uncomfortable, i just can't handle what's happening to me, and i want something stable to hold on to, and i know that your hand won't twist into claws beneath mine.

and if it does, it's okay if you hurt me.

i don't think i'd mind.