i know i made a post really recently, but i'm making another one. it's 9:45 pm and i went to bed an hour ago out of pure boredom. i've got my window open because it's been raining and i can't stand not hearing the rain when it's happening. it smells like... i don't even know what. rain and dirt and that smell that asphalt gives off when it's wet and green growing things. it's dark outside. but anyway, it's one of those nights that keeps reminding me of things out of the blue. books i've read and poetry and the way the smell of cigarette smoke lingers in your nostrils and clings to clothing. i know i shouldn't romanticize cigarettes so much, but i like the way they smell, okay? and it's not like i can actually smoke them anyway. my shitty fucking lungs would pitch a fit. and i wish somebody was here. not just over the internet or on the phone, but a person i can look at and talk with and tell all the things that pop into my head that make no sense. i just want a friend.